"Big Mother" is watching your children: Hillary Clinton wants more children. Specifically, she wants your children, the Libertarian Party warns: "Forget about Big Brother watching you; it's time to start worrying about Big Mother watching your kids," charged Steve Dasbach, national chairman of the Libertarian Party. "The first lady wants to be the nation's Baby-Sitter-in-Chief, and she's not going to stop until she gets an army of government paid, government trained day-care bureaucrats taking care of America's children."

At a (late October) White House conference on child care, Bill and Hillary Clinton unveiled a new $250 million federal program to "solve" the problem of day-care. It included taxpayer-financed scholarships for day-care workers and day-care subsidies for low-income parents.

While Hillary stopped short of endorsing a large-scale federal child-care program, it least one of her guest experts at the conference advocated a $100-billion-a-year, tax-subsidized federal day-care program. "The 'Village' people are back," said Dasbach, referring to the coercive communitarianism espoused in Hillary's book, "It Take a Village."

Dasbach acknowledged that child-care costs one pose a hardship for many working parents, "But it's simply not fair for politicians to punish parents who stay at home with their kids by saddling them with other people's baby-sitting bills. And getting the federal government more involved in raising our children is not a responsible solution. "After all, do we want government day-care centers that have the efficiency of the Department of Motor Vehicles the compassion of the BATF, the reliability of the Post Office, and the customer service of the IRS?"

Ironically, government can play a role in making child care more affordable, Dasbach said; but not the way Hillary thinks. "Politicians can made day-care bills disappear overnight for millions of American families simply by lowering our tax burden. If the government quit seizing half of the average American family's income, millions of mothers or fathers who wanted to say home to care for their children could afford to do so, instead of having to work." (Libertarian Party press release)

Park Service dumps on taxpayers with construction of $500,000 outhouse: Mr. Speaker, the U.S. Park Service built a $500,000 outhouse. That is right. This Taj Mahal has a slate roof, a pore and a cobble-stone foundation. The paint cost $80 a gallon. The wild-flower seed was $720 a pound. Unbelievable. To boot, it is earthquake proof, able to withstand the shock of 6.5 on the Richter, either from without or within.

Mr. Speaker, if that is not enough to warm your globe, there is no running water and the special high-technology, self-composting toilets cost $13,000 each. The Park Service said, 'We tried to cut costs desperately.'

Mr. Speaker. I have a suggestion. Why do they not cut those $13,000 toilets in half to better accommodate all those half-assed bureaucrats at the U.S. Park Service?" (Rep. Jim Traficant (D-Ohio), in October 22 remarks before the House.)

Also regarding half-moons: The city council in Laramie, Wyoming, defeated a proposed ordinance that would have cracked down on the public (if inadvertent) display of buttocks, while another provision would have risen against the tell-tale signs of male arousal.

The ordinance, defeated in early November, would have expanded the definition of nudity to be banned in public places. It would have prohibited the  showing of the cleft of buttocks in public, creating a new class of criminals including construction workers on their lunch breaks.

Another section of the proposal covered a part of the male body that may be clothed, yet still discernible to the naked eye. The public display of "male genitals in a discernibly turgid state" would have become illegal. Some observers wonder how Larmie's finest would have gone about detecting miscreants, be it through visual inspection or perhaps high-tech infrared imaging. Others have suggested that pat-down searches might do more harm than good with some suspects; evidence might also disappear on the way to the pokey. "This proposal has benerated a lot of interest, mostly on campus," said Laramie City Clerk Susan Morris-Jones, who kindly faxed along a copy of the proposed ordinance. Laramie is home to about 27,000 people, including more than 10,000 students at the University of Wyoming.

Jones said the town has an existing public indecency ordinance that the new proposal would have clarified to aid enforcement. The town has no establishments with nude dancing, although out-of-town male and female "reviews" appear at local watering holes about "once or twice a year," she said.  (Media Bypass Magazine)

Hug a Manipulative Ad Executive: A shocking research finding was presented at the 88th convention of the Association of National Advertisers devoted to "Branding the Future." Scott Bedberry, a marketing v-p with Starbuck's, told the assembled ad executives that today, "Consumers don't truly believe there's a huge difference between products."

How to respond to such traitorous notions? Make significant changes in products? No. The key, says Mr. Bedberry, is to "establish emotional ties" between brands and consumers. Fortunately, this is a mounting rend. Carl Pascarella, CEO of VISA USA, proclaimed the good news that "name-brand products have recaptured the hearts and minds of consumers? Now that we are all breathing a sigh of relief, there is this advice from American Express' John Haynes on how to solidify the all-important brand-customer bond. Using a new definition of the word "dialog" better fit for the mass media. Haynes tells advertisers to "create and sustain a dialogue with your customer." (American Newspeak).

FBI Field Alert, faxed to wrong guy. Warns of anticipated terrorism out west: The FBI bolstered its staff in Coeur d'Alene, Idaho and is requesting additional help; a move that may be related to an errant FBI fax warning of impending domestic terrorism.

The Coeur d'Alene FBI office, which covers five northern Idaho counties, recently increased from three to five agents and is requesting two more field officers and possibly a supervisor, according to a recent account in the Coeur d'Alene Press.

Mike Dillon, agent in charge of the six FBI offices in Idaho, said population growth is the single biggest reason for the request. "We need to have the resources in place in front of the curve, if that's possible. I don't always get what I ask for," he told the Press.

But a Spokane, Washington businessman says the increase in agents is consistent with an FBI field alert that was inadvertently faxed on October 9 to his movie poster store. Eric DuBois was quoted as saying the 11-page document, on FBI letterhead and marked "confidential," discusses potential militia-linked terrorist activity. Spokane is roughly 30 miles east of Coeur d'Alene.

DuBois said the document refers to potential acts of terrorism anticipated in November and December in North Idaho and other Western stats. "The FBI doesn't know how it came to me," DuBois told Media Bypass in a telephone interview. DuBois returned the document to the FBI in Spokane, but kept a copy for himself. He said no one from the agency thanked him or told him not to talk about the fax.

Dillon insisted the information in the fax has nothing to do with his request for more personnel in Coeur d'Alene. "I can assure you there is no connection," he said. (But when have we been able to believe any federal agent?) Dillon's claim runs counter to a belief held by the Coeur d'Alene Area Chamber of Commerce committee's on public safety, which is chaired by a captain with the local sheriff's department. "The FBI is more than doubling staff in the Coeur d'Alene office in response to anticipated domestic terrorism activity, even though the state of Idaho leads the nation in anti-terrorism legislation," states a background note from the committee.

An October 27 report in the Seattle Spokesman-Review said the fax names "radicals who are believed to have stockpiled rifles, handguns and explosives," and is based on an informant's allegations. DuBois showed a copy of the fax to the newspaper, which did not print the names and places mentioned in the report. "I do not wish to jeopardize an ongoing investigation by the FBI, nor do I wish to name individuals who are merely suspected of criminal activity...They may be innocent," he said.

However, DuBois said he is mulling over the release of additional details, including specific targets throughout what he said is a "corridor running from the Southwest to the Northwest. I'm looking at the particular dates named through the holiday period, and want to warn those communities to take precautions. It may not be wise to have the relatives over this year."

DuBois said he has been contacted by individuals identifying themselves as "patriots" or as being affiliated with militia groups. "I think their intent was to be honest with me, and they've been respective of my thoughts and wishes," he said. "They agree that security has been compromised and somebody has a big lesson to learn here, that we don't want the wrong data going to the wrong people."

DuBois referenced the recent convictions of four Sandpoint, Idaho men, linked to the Christian Identity movement for last year's bombing s of a Spokane newspaper office and Planned Parenthood clinic, and a related bank robbery. "I operate a small business in the Riverfront Park area, where we have picked up shrapnel out of the ground,' he said. "The threat has been demonstrated to us, and I felt I should alert everyone about this apparently new threat...Nobody around here wants to count bodies over the holidays." (Media Bypass)

So Sorry, Son: A letter from school: "Dear Dad: $chool i$ really great. I am making lot$ of friend$ and $tudying hard. With all my $tuff. I $imply can't think of anything I need. $o if you like, you can ju$t $end me a card, a$ I would love to hear from you. Love Your $on."

A week later...a letter from home: "Dear Son: I kNOw that astroNOmy, ecoNOmics and oceaNOgraphy are eNOugh to keep even an hoNOr student busy. Do Not forget that the pursuit of kNOledge is a Noble task and you can never study eNOugh." Love Dad. (Author Unknown)